Kingdom Hearts: Parody Mix
by Descendant of Truth
Summary: Sora is a very high-strung boy who dreams of leaving his island with his friends, Riku and Kairi. When disaster strikes, how will this hyperactive teenager handle things when he's suddenly teamed up with tempermental Donald and relaxed Goofy? Oh, and I think there was a cricket in there somewhere. This story parodies the events of Kingdom Hearts 1! Contains slight SoKai.
1. Determining Your Skills

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Kingdom Hearts series in any way, shape, or form.**

 **Okay, so I realized that the formatting for this chapter was all screwy, not to mention the complete lack of Author Notes. So... not much here was changed, really, aside from better formatting and the occasional change in phrasing. Oh, and in the original, there was no form of quotation around Texter's dialogue, which was unintentional. There was originally the 'greater than' and 'less than' signs around his dialogue to show that he is speaking with his thoughts, like in the Animorphs series.**

 **Only, doesn't allow those marks, I guess. Shame, really.**

 **But anyways, without any further ado, I hope you all enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

It was pitch dark all around him. There was nothing to be seen in the black abyss that enveloped everything. It was like being blind; no sense of direction, and nothing to see but pure darkness.

Or, it would be, had there not been the giant, glowing platform beneath him that held the portrait of a girl.

The platform was perfectly circular, decorated with various other circles, but most prominently the picture of a girl with short, black hair, very pale skin, and red lips (for some reason these attributes seemed notable), wearing a blue and yellow dress. She was obviously a figure of royalty.

Standing on top of this platform was a young, fourteen-year-old boy with spiky brown hair and red shorts that poofed out so much, everyone considered him a complete and utter dork for wearing them. This boy's name was Sora. And Sora was busy looking this way and that, trying to figure out where he was. However, he was hardly being calm about it.

"HOLY CRAP, WHERE AM I!?" was the first thing Sora could think to say upon entering this new, strange place. "W-where is everybody?! HELLOOOOO!? HEY, IS ANYBODY THERE?!" Upon receiving no answer to his plights, Sora suddenly broke down, crying. "Waaahhh... where _am_ I? I don't like this place! I mean, that's some really nice window-art, but..." he trailed off.

Suddenly, he heard a voice. But it wasn't a normal voice, really, because it had no real volume. The voice only sounded in his head.

So much to do, so little time... was all the voice said. Sora very promptly stopped crying and instead started panicking again.

"AAAGGHH! WHO'S THERE?! Am I going crazy?!" he shouted.

No, of course you're not going crazy! Why would you think suddenly hearing a disembodied voice in your head while experiencing a bout of fear and quite possibly trauma in a blank, empty space would indicate that you're going crazy? the voice said, sarcastically. Sora, not known for easily being able to pick up on sarcasm, took this seriously and replied,

"Huh. You know, I never thought about it that way before." Quickly becoming accustomed to the fact that he was talking to a disembodied voice in his head, Sora decided to ask a few questions. "So, Texter, could you tell me where I am? And where you are?" he asked, all forms of distress vanishing from him. There was a long silence.

..."Texter"? the voice questioned, utterly confused at the new nickname.

"Yeah. Texter. I figure, the only way I'd be able to know what you're saying without looking at you is with text." he explained. But then, a thought came to him. "Oh, do you not like it because it sounds too much like a guy's name? I mean, I can't tell if you're a guy or a girl, so..." It was true; the voice sounded almost completely gender-neutral. The voice sighed.

Whatever. Just let me finish what I came here to say.

"Wait, you came to say something in specific?" Sora asked, now more confused than anything. The voice suddenly took on an ominous tone, as if he was telling a prophecy of some sort.

So much to do, so little time... he began.

"You said that already." Sora pointed out. He was going to take a moment to congratulate himself for having enough of an attention span to remember how a conversation started when he was interrupted by 'Texter'.

Moving on, now... take your time. this just led to Sora being more confused.

"Wait a second... I thought you just said, "So much to do, so little time." Now you're telling me to take my time? WHICH IS IT!?" he exclaimed. Texter sighed again.

Look, just... don't be afraid. The door is still shut. Texter continued.

"Door? What door? Are you talking about the door to my house? Of course it's still shut-"

Would you shut up?! God, I'm getting tired of you interrupting me every time I say a sentence! Texter shouted, his patience starting to run out. Sora shrugged.

"Well, maybe I wouldn't keep interrupting you if you would just say things that made more sense." he said.

Ugh, you know what? Just step forward already. You know how to do that, right? he added, a bit antagonistically. Sora "hmph-ed" and responded,

"Hey, come on, now. I'm not _that_ stupid." And with that, he started walking forward on the giant, glowing platform. He had just about reached the middle when, out of nowhere, three large pedestals started erupting from the ground in a sparkly flash of light. This, once again, made Sora panic. "GAH! DEMON ROCKS!" he shouted. Texter sighed and mentally face palmed at Sora's reaction but said nothing about it. Instead, he said,

Power sleeps within you. Sleeping, because I can tell you're clearly too dim-witted to actually bother to use it. However, if you give it form... then it will give you actual strength. Texter continued, as weapons appeared floating over the pedestals in another flash of light. A sword over the middle pedestal, a shield over the left pedestal, and over the right pedestal, a rod with a blue sphere with two other spheres on top of it.

The top of the rod totally didn't resemble the head of the famous Mickey Mouse whatsoever. That would just be silly.

"WAAAGH! DEMON WEAPONS!" Sora exclaimed.

Choose well, Texter said, or you might just end up doing something stupid. The shield contains the Power of the Guardian, the kindness to aid friends; it is a shield to repel all.

"All... what? Do I get to use it to protect myself in a food fight?!" Sora asked, excited now more than anything. Texter promptly decided to ignore him and continue with his explanations.

The rod contains the Power of the Mystic, inner strength; it is a staff of wonder and ruin.

"Ooh, sounds fancy!" Sora commented.

The sword holds the Power of the Warrior, invincible courage; a sword of terrible destruction.

"Destruction, huh? SOUNDS AWESOME!" Sora shouted.

...W-wait, what? You're going with _that_ one? Texter asked, dumbfounded.

"Well, yeah! Inner strength is cool and all, but let's face it, in a real fight, I'm gonna need some brute strength. I mean, look these puny arms! I need something to help me when things go wrong." he explained. There was a moment of silence.

... You're just going with it because you think blowing stuff up is cool, aren't you?

"Yeah, pretty much."

Alright, then... just as long as you don't regret it later. the sword suddenly disappeared from Sora's hands in yet another flash of light. Sora, agitated that his new, destructive power got taken away, was about to start yelling again when Texter said, Your path has been set. Now, what will you give up in exchange? The Power of the Mystic, or the Power of the Guardian? this just made Sora angry.

"Hey, come on, now! No one said anything about giving up something in exchange for something else! What kind of thievery is this?!" Sora demanded.

Ugh! It's _touka koukan_ , alright?! There was yet another long silence. In Sora's case, it was a very confused silence.

"... Uh, what?"

Equivalent exchange. he explained.

"Oh. Well you could have just said that in the first place!" Sora retorted.

I did, just... not in English...

"Exactly. Say it in English next time."

Will you just pick what you're going to give up in exchange, already?! This is taking _way_ longer than it should have! Texter demanded.

"Fine, fine! Just give me a moment to think..." and with that, Sora started thinking. Would it be better to give up inner strength or kindness to protect others?

Now, Sora is well known for not being able to think about things for long periods of time. So he was more or less under a time limit when it came to this decision. And while most people would take note of the fact that it takes a certain amount of inner strength to protect one's friends, Sora was more so thinking about which one would be cooler when added to a sword. As such, he didn't think about this decision for much more than five seconds. "Okay, I'll give up the blue rod thingy." he declared.

Out of curiosity, why? Texter asked.

"Well, a few different reasons, actually, but mainly because a shield works so much better with a sword than a rod. Also, that rod looks freaking stupid. I mean, I'm not sure why, but whenever I look at it, it makes me think of a mouse head. So... yeah." he explained.

That... seems like kind of skewed logic to me, but okay, whatever. Also, by giving up the rod, that doesn't mean you've acquired the shield. he added.

"Wait, what?!"

On to the next thing! As soon as Texter finished saying this, the pedestals started crumbling, as did the platform Sora was standing on. Eventually, the platform was destroyed completely and Sora was left with nothing to stand on.

"AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH! HELP! I'M FALLING TO MY DEATH! TEXTER, YOU HORRIBLE, EVIL, THING OF INVISIBILITY! YOU JUST ABANDONED ME TO DEATH!" Sora screamed, outraged. Not being able to think of any more insults, Sora gave into the fear of falling into an abyss and started screaming like a little girl.

Will you shut up, already?! You're not going to die! See, look! There's another giant, glowing platform below you! Texter yelled. And there was, indeed, another platform below him. It also had the picture of princess, this one wearing a blue dress and had brown hair.

"Huh?! Oh, I guess you're right. Sorry, Texter! I guess I had the wrong idea about you! Still, breaking the platform was kind of unnecessary, don'tcha think?" Sora asked.

Yeah, maybe. But I'm trying to establish a theme here, so quit complaining! Texter retorted. Sora finally landed on the platform, wondering what he was supposed to do now.

"I wonder what I'm supposed to do now?" he wondered aloud. Then the sword from earlier reappeared in his hand.

You now have the power to fight. Texter stated.

"Well, duh," Sora replied, "I've been able to fight ever since I was a kid. Had to handle Kairi somehow, didn't I?"

Just attack the air already so I can complement you! Texter demanded.

"…Wait, are you working with a _script?_ "

Just do it already! he said quickly, obviously trying to hide the fact that he was, indeed, working with a script. Grumbling, Sora slashed at the air with his new sword. All right! You've got it. Texter stated, sounding noticeably less enthusiastic than someone is supposed to sound when giving someone a compliment. Rather, he just sounded impatient. Now use this power to protect yourself and others. Don't just go flinging it around for fun, you hear me? Power is a delicate thing that one must use wisely, and if you don't-

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just tell me what I'm supposed to do next." Sora interrupted, quickly becoming impatient with this much-needed lecture.

Fine! You may not know this yet, but there will be times when you have to fight.

"You mean like when I do something to upset Kairi or when I poke fun at Riku when he's in a bad mood? Yeah, I knew that already."

Yes, well, can you take on things like… this, for instance? when he got to the word "this", a small, black shadow appeared on the ground and came up in three dimensions rather than the usual two. A few more of them appeared, which did nothing but scare the heck out of Sora.

"GAAAHH! DEMONS! EVIL SHADOW DEMON THINGS!" pausing to consider this, he added, "Actually, they're kind of cute…."

Stop focusing on how cute they are and keep your light burning strong! Oh, and by the way, those things are going to attack you. he added.

"Wait, WHAT!?" was all Sora could say before one of the shadow creatures lunged at him. He let out a yelp and swung the sword at it. Somehow, this didn't defeat it in one blow. Sora started ferociously hacking at it with the sword until it disappeared in a puff of smoke. Still panicking as the other shadow creatures began attacking him again. Sora, of course, continued to attack them probably more hastily than he needed to considering the fact that the things weren't that strong. When they were all defeated, Texter finally made a comment.

By the way, sometimes enemies drop items. You can pick up these items by walking on them. he explained.

"Uh, wouldn't that just crush them?" Sora asked.

Someone such as _you_ would not understand the physics of the natural world. By the way, one of those things is right behind you.

"Huh?!" Spinning around to look behind him, Sora let out yet another yelp and started flinging his sword around without actually aiming at anything. Despite this, he managed to defeat the shadow creature in yet another puff of smoke. Sora was now panting, not due to his constant erratic movements, but rather because he was freaking out probably more than he should have. "Please tell me there aren't any more of these things!" he said, getting the impression that Texter was sending these at him just for his own amusement.

Well, I can't necessarily say that there won't be any more of them, but I think you should be more concerned with the floor. he replied.

"Wait, what's happening to the floor-? GAH!" he yelled, suddenly noticing that the floor was dissolving beneath him once again. This time, however, it was acting more like quicksand as it quickly dragged him downwards. Panicking, screaming, and flailing about constantly, Sora was unable to get a hold on anything before he was sucked up by the darkness completely.

Still screaming, and now falling, Sora was a bit too busy panicking to think of anything to say about his current situation. So instead, he tried slapping the air as if to keep the darkness away from him, but to no avail. Texter, however, was busy wondering how Sora had the energy to keep screaming like this so frequently.

Then he landed. Really hard. "OW! Dude, that freakin' _hurt!_ " he complained.

This platform, however, did not bear the picture of princess, although it was extremely pink-themed. However, Sora was too busy trying not to have a heart attack to notice this. After taking several deep breaths and wondering what the heck was going on here, Sora finally stood up and noticed a grey, transparent doorway in front of him. Seeing as Texter was being unusually silent and having nothing better to do, Sora tried to open the door.

And failed miserably.

No matter how hard he pushed or pulled on those doorknobs, it just wouldn't open. Now more annoyed than anything, Sora decided to ask Texter for advice. "Hey, Texter! What am I supposed to do to open this door?! This thing must have a stinkin' lock on it or something!" he complained.

Hm? Oh, right! I almost forgot to give you this treasure chest. he replied. Confused, Sora started looking around, trying to figure out where this so-called 'treasure chest' was.

"Treasure chest? What treasure chest? I don't see any treasure…" Sora said. Then, in a flash of light, a small, red treasure chest appeared in front of him. "Oh. _That_ treasure chest. Okay, then." Now becoming used to things appearing in sudden, inexplicable flashes of light, Sora approached the treasure chest and opened it.

Unfortunately, nothing was in it. It also disappeared as soon as he opened it. "That did absolutely nothing! What was the point of that?!" he demanded.

Shut up and start smashing those boxes!

"Huh?" Sora had to turn around in order to actually see these boxes, as they for some reason spawned behind him. "Well, I mean… okay, but how does that help me with the door?" he asked.

Would you stop questioning my logic, already?! Why can't you just do this without trying to make a conversation?! Can't you see that I'm trying to make this scene _mysterious?!_

"No, actually."

Well, crap. Nothing I can do about that, then… AND WHY AREN'T YOU BREAKING THE BOXES YET?! Texter yelled. Startled by hearing Texter properly yell for the first time, Sora let out a hasty, "Yes, sir!" and proceeded to viciously beat the stuffing out of those boxes. Upon destroying the boxes, Sora felt unreasonably victorious.

"Ha-HAH! Take that, you unreasonably square, evil, wooden, THING! HAHAHAHAAAA!" he exclaimed. Texter sighed for what was probably the fourth time that day and said,

Look, you can go through the door now. So just do it already. I'm getting tired of this… Texter said.

"Aw, you're no fun. But fine." He promptly decided to open the door, only to have a blinding light shone in his eyes. "OH, DEAR GOD, MY EYES!" he screamed as he covered his eyes with his hands. Before he walked into the incredibly suspicious, blinding light, he turned his head upwards and added, "By the way, Texter, will I get to talk to you again after I go through this door?" This caused Texter to just be puzzled.

Why would you want to talk to me again? I've done nothing but thrown you around left and right, forcing you to fight small monsters, and talk about confusing stuff. he asked.

"Well, because you're my friend!" Sora responded without hesitation.

…You _are_ aware of the fact that you've barely known me for ten minutes, right?

"Oh, come on, now! I'm always friends with the arguably suspicious people that pop up out of nowhere and say things that my brain can't and probably never will understand! That's just basic principle. Get with the times, man!" Sora explained. There was a long silence.

…I give up.

"Aw, why?"

Because you're clearly an idiot. this made Sora smile.

"Haha! You know, that's the exact same thing Riku said to me after we'd known each other for ten minutes, and look at us now! We're best buddies!" Sora said cheerfully.

And you met him how recently, exactly? Texter questioned, almost afraid of the answer.

"Oh, we've known each other for ten years now." He replied.

…And you remember the exact words he said to you after knowing him for ten minutes because…?

"Oh, I remember all kinds of things about my friends."

That's… kind of creepy. You know what, how about you just go through that door and stop bugging me for a bit, okay?

"Okay!" he agreed, and with that, he went through the door into the incredibly suspicious, blinding light. When he stepped through it, he was suddenly greeted with his home islands, called 'Destiny Islands'. This, of course, surprised Sora greatly. "W-wait, WHAT!? I'm back home?! HOW!? Gah, none of this makes any sense!" he exclaimed.

That's because it's not supposed to.

"WAAAGH! Texter?!" Sora shouted in surprise. "What are you doing here?! I thought you were stuck in that weird, black abyss!"

Yeah, well, I came here to tell you that the door won't open yet. he explained.

"Uh, hello?! It _just did!_ WHAT DO YOU MEAN, 'IT WON'T OPEN YET'!?" seriously starting to get annoyed now, Sora was beginning to wonder if Texter was ever going to say something that made sense.

Look, just tell me more about yourself so I can be confident that I'm not sending a complete moron off to do something actually important! Texter demanded. Sora, deciding not to question what 'something actually important' meant, suddenly noticed that one of his friends, Selphie, was sitting right in front of him.

"Oh, hi, Selphie! What's up?" Sora asked, deciding that it was better not to question what she was doing there and why she didn't think it was odd that he was talking to himself.

"Sora, what would you say is most important to you? Being number one, friendship, or your prized possessions?" she asked in response. Confused by the sudden heart-to-heart question, although not bothered or suspicious of it, Sora responded,

"Well, friendship, obviously. I mean, my friends are wonderful, so…" he trailed off, not feeling that any more explanation was necessary. Selphie gave him a look that meant, "Yeah, but you also have problems."

Seeing that there wasn't going to be any further conversation, Sora awkwardly walked away, wondering once again what that was about. While he was walking away, however, he bumped into one of the other people who lived on the islands, Wakka. "Oh, hey there, Wakka!" he said. Wakka gave him a look as though to say, "You are one hopeless little human thing." Sora wasn't quite sure why these words came to mind when he saw that expression, but they did. Instead of actually saying that, however, he said,

"What is it that you want outta life? Seeing rare sights? To broaden your horizons? Or just to be strong?"

By now, Sora was starting to wonder if suddenly everyone on Destiny Islands was trying to get to know him better. It was only now that he started feeling slightly disturbed by the personal question, as well.

"Uh… well, 'being strong' is really vague, and I have no idea what a 'horizon' is, so I guess I'll go with rare sights." He replied, sounding noticeably more hesitant than before.

"Huh, okay." Wakka commented, and with that, he was done talking.

Panicking now, Sora quickly ran away from him in the opposite direction. _What's with these guys?_ Sora wondered, _I mean, this is seriously starting to be freaky. If it was just Selphie, I would probably be able to handle it, but now Wakka? What's next?_

'Next' turned out to be Tidus, who was yet another inhabitant of Destiny Islands. Tidus gave him a sort of glare, as if he was trying to figure out what Sora's problem was.

"O-oh, um, hi, Tidus… how's it going…?" Sora asked cautiously. Tidus glared a bit harder at Sora and said,

"Okay, what is it you're so afraid of?" That made Sora lose his self-control completely.

"What do you _think?!_ Every time I talk to somebody, they ask me some kind of weird, personal question and give me three possible answers to it! Now you're asking me what I'm afraid of!? WHAT KIND OF QUIZ SHOW IS THIS?!" he shouted. Tidus didn't seemed fazed in the slightest by Sora's outburst.

"Yeah, well, here's another question: what _are_ you afraid of? Getting old, being different, or being indecisive?" he demanded. If anything, this just made Sora lose it even more.

"GAAH! WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP ASKING ME THESE THINGS!? BUT FINE! I'll be honest! I'm afraid of being indecisive, okay?!" he screamed. This was followed by a long silence and Tidus giving him an exasperated look.

Ah, I see.

"GYAAAAAH! Texter, why do you keep popping up at times like this!?" Sora complained. Texter ignored this and continued on with his reflection.

So, you want friendship. To see rare sights. But you're afraid of being indecisive.

"HAVE YOU BEEN SPYING ON ME!?" Sora demanded, only just now asking the question most people would have asked much sooner.

Maybe. Just to let you know, your adventure will begin at midday. Just try to keep a steady pace, alright? If you do that, then you'll come out fine.

"DANG IT, TEXTER, STOP SAYING CONFUSING THINGS!" he shouted. Texter ignored this and continued,

The day you will open the door is both far off and very near.

" _What did I just say, Texter!?_ "

Sora didn't get an answer to that, but he was too busy being distracted by another blinding flash of light to say anything else. When the flash of light faded, he found himself in the black abyss again, standing on yet another glowing platform with a princess on it. This princess had long, blonde hair and wore a purple dress. "Okay, Texter, what kind of tricks are playing on me _now?!_ " he demanded. Texter, however, was being extremely silent for some reason, so Sora had no idea what he was supposed to be doing. Angry that he was being thrown from one location to another so frequently, Sora started running around the platform in both rage and an attempt to figure out what was supposed to happen. After doing this for about four minutes straight, and still feeling like he was being ripped off, Sora finally stopped to catch his breath.

It was then when some of the shadow creatures showed up. Sora gave them a glare. "Would you stop following me?! I'm getting really sick of this!" he said. His complaining, however, did nothing to stop the shadow creatures from spawning, and he was soon surrounded by them. "Okay, fine! I guess I'll just have to get rid of all of you, then!"

And so, he fought. He decided to use this as an opportunity to try out some new combos, like jumping while he was fighting, for instance. Seeing as this was both effective and extremely fun, Sora managed to rally them all up in the air while he proceeded to attack them with the sword, which had spawned into his hands before he started fighting.

Once they were all defeated, a bright light shone down in front of him, causing the floor to glow more than it already was. Sora, curious to see what would happen if he stepped onto the glowing circle, impulsively did just that.

As it turned out, stepping on this glowing platform was actually a good thing, since a different circular light appeared and went into the distance, creating big, fancy stairs in its wake. "WHOA, MAGIC STAIRCASE THINGY!" he exclaimed, and decided that since he had nothing better to do, he went up the steps to wherever it was that they led. Unfortunately, this magical staircase was extremely long and tedious. As such, Sora decided to complain about it since Texter was still being silent. "Why… is this staircase… so freaking long?!" he said between gasps. It was a long staircase, and he was running, after all.

Eventually, though, he reached the top, which turned out to be… _another_ giant glowing platform with a picture of a princess on it. This one had brown hair and a yellow dress. "OKAY, TEXTER, WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PRINCESSES ON THESE THINGS?! I'm starting to get tired of it!" he shouted.

By now, Texter finally decided to say something.

You know what? I have no idea. Maybe you just really like princesses, he said, but in any case, I have another incredibly vague sentence for you.

" _Seriously?!_ "

Yes, now be quiet! Now let's see if you can understand any of this: the closer you get to the light, the greater your shadow becomes. he said. Sora looked behind himself to take a look at his shadow, which was both very dark and very long.

"Huh, I guess it is pretty big. But so what?" he asked, not understanding what Texter was getting at in the slightest. He would soon understand what he meant, though, because his shadow suddenly erupted into three dimensions, just like the shadow creatures. Only this one was gigantic, not to mention the fact that it started morphing. "AAAAAAUUUUUGGGHH!" he screamed, "OH MY GOD, WHAT THE HECK _IS_ THAT THING!?"

Don't be afraid. came the ever-so-helpful advice from Texter.

"Uh, _kind_ of too late for that, PAL!" Sora shouted.

And don't forget… he added mysteriously, as what had once been Sora's shadow became a giant, three-dimensional monster with hair that reminded Sora of octopus tentacles. It was also coming nearer by the moment, causing Sora to completely lose any form of bravery he might have had before then. Letting out an ear-splitting screech of terror, Sora ran away from the huge shadow as fast as he could, only to be met with the edge of the platform. Seeing nothing but blackness below him, Sora turned around to look at the shadow monster in fright.

He was now faced with two options: jump into the black abyss below with possibly nothing to catch him, or to fight the giant, menacing shadow monster with nothing but a sword and his complete lack of experience. Frightened by the difficult decision, Sora was about to choose jumping when he remembered Texter's words.

 _It is a sword of terrible destruction._

 _Oh, yeah!_ he thought, _I_ do _have awesome powers now! But how do I fight something THAT BIG?!_ Suddenly discouraged, Sora tried to remember the words Riku said to him several years ago, after they had finished sparring.

" _Yeah, I'd say you're fairly adequate."_ He had said. _That's right!_ he realized, and after remembering that Texter had said that he was trying to establish a 'falling' theme, shouted,

"That's right… I'm… I'm FAIRLY ADEQUATE!" then, to Texter, "AND NO WAY AM I GIVING IN TO YOUR SO-CALLED 'THEME'!"

Then, with the utmost defiance and some courage, Sora summoned his sword and charged into battle.

The giant shadow creature made the first move. He pounded his fist on the ground, causing black and purple swirls to appear on the ground where he hit. However, he did this INCREDIBLY slowly, allowing Sora the time to get several attacks on his other arm. Unfortunately, the giant shadow monster's attack spawned more of the small shadow creatures from before, which very suddenly started attacking Sora. "ACK! GET OFF OF ME!" he cried, right before viciously hacking them off with the sword. The shadowy hole continued to spawn the small shadow creatures, which attacked much more frequently than the big one, so Sora had to take care of them, first. This, thankfully, was fairly easy to do, and once he was done, he continued to attack the big shadow monster's arms.

While he did this, Sora noticed that, simply by slashing his sword, he was able to maintain more time in the air than he thought was physically possible. It wasn't a particularly long amount of time, but he felt extremely pleased with the sudden lack of physics, something he very outwardly expressed. "Oh, YES! This is EXCELLENT! If only things worked like this _all_ the time!" distracted by this new, awesome experience, Sora decided to start doing a jig.

Witnessing Sora jig turned out to be too much for the shadow creature, and it decided to get serious and knocked Sora across the platform. Sora let out a cry of surprise with a bit of pain before landing harshly on the ground. "Oww! Hey, no fair! I was dancing!" he exclaimed.

"Enough! I've had it with you and hacking at my arms constantly! And if you ever jig again, I won't hesitate to murder you! In fact, I should probably just dispose of you right now to keep you from dancing ever again!" the shadow monster yelled in a deep, echoed voice. Sora, surprised at the fact that the thing could talk, let out a scream that was both too desperate and too long to express simple shock. As usual, Sora was panicking, trying to back away but found himself stuck in some kind of dark, swirly circle on the floor beneath him.

"AAAAGH! WHAT IS THIS, SOME KIND OF DARK, MAGICAL, SUPER-GLUE?!" he yelled.

Wow, that was the weirdest description of a Dark Circle I've ever heard. Texter commented.

"This REALLY isn't the time for this, Texter!" Sora replied, panicking even more now as dark fog started to take a hold of his leg.

But don't be afraid. he added, almost completely insensitive to the actual fear Sora was experiencing.

"You already said that, and I am PLENTY scared, thank you very much!" he shouted, becoming more and more concerned as the seconds went by.

You hold the mightiest weapon of all. came Texter's voice yet again, as Sora's body continued to be engulfed in the dark fog.

"Yeah, well, if it's so FREAKING MIGHTY, then maybe it can do something to, I don't know, SAVE ME RIGHT NOW!?" Sora cried, his panic levels nearly reaching their max. Texter, of course, continued on as if Sora hadn't said anything.

So don't forget: he said as Sora was completely covered in the dark fog.

"AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!" came Sora's cry of despair, feeling as though he was about to have a heart attack any moment now.

You are the one… who will open the door. he finished. Sora was about to comment how opening a door would do nothing to help him, but was too frightened to say anything. His panic levels finally reaching beyond their maximum capacity, Sora, very suddenly, fainted. And darkness was all he saw before he awoke.

* * *

 **Author's Notes:** **Now, you might be wondering, why on EARTH would I spend an entire chapter making fun of the dream sequence? Because let's face it, there is so much stuff that doesn't make sense in the dream sequence, how could I not? It just so happened to be long enough to encompass an entire chapter anyways, so... yeah.**

 **Also, something I've been wondering for years now... who even IS Texter? I recently came upon the idea that it could be Ventus, but he just doesn't really act like Ventus, plus, how would he know any of this? Is Texter just this universe's God?**

 **So many questions, so little time. XD**


	2. After the Dream

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Disney, Square Enix, or any of their products, including characters, names of places, etc. All rights go to their respective owners.

* * *

"Sora…"

" _Sora…_ "

"DANG IT, SORA, WAKE UP!"

Then someone slapped him.

"AAAAAAGGGHHH!" Sora yelled, waking up very suddenly. Looking up, Sora found the source of the voice and the slap that woke him up: his friend, Kairi. Utterly delighted to see a familiar face, Sora, quite suddenly, got on his knees and gave her a hug, crying in relief. "I am _so glad_ that you're here, Kairi! I was in some weird, black abyss, with glowing platforms that had princesses on them, and then there was this voice in my head-I called him Texter, by the way-and he made absolutely _no_ sense, and then I was back here, and everyone was asking me personal questions, and then I was back in the abyss, and then I had to fight this giant monster thing, and then— _and then_ …" he rambled, still in shock of being swallowed up by magical darkness in an abyss while some telepath kept saying entirely useless stuff. He was going to continue, but was interrupted by Kairi slapping him again.

"Sora, get off of me, and what the heck are you even talking about?" she demanded, trying to force Sora away from her. Sora stood up, albeit shakily, (finally letting go of Kairi) and cried,

"I WAS SUCKED UP BY SOME BLACK, SWIRLY WHIRLPOOL OF SUPER-GLUED _DEATH!_ "

In response to this, Kairi gave him a look like he was crazy, because at this point, he certainly sounded like it.

"Um… yeah. Right. You have some _weird_ dreams, Sora." She replied. At this point, she had accepted that Sora was a very high-strung individual, especially in response to nightmares. Sora gave her a defiant face, starting to get a hold on himself, and replied,

"It _wasn't_ a dream! If it was, then it wouldn't have felt real! I really _did_ get an epic sword and fought some weird shadowy creature things!" then he paused to consider this. "Unless it actually _was_ a dream… in which case…"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just don't hug me again, okay? That was _really_ pathetic." Kairi interrupted harshly. It was only then that Sora properly realized that he had, in fact, given Kairi a hug. Upon realizing this, he very suddenly forgot his fear of being absorbed by a whirlpool of super-glue and started blushing furiously.

"Uh, oh, um, r-right. Th-that _did_ happen, didn't it…. Um, well, uh, you see, I-I can explain…" he stuttered, trying to avoid making eye contact.

As you might have guessed by now, Sora had a very noticeable crush on Kairi, something Kairi herself took great pride in ignoring. Why he liked her at all was a mystery to everyone, as she was known for being a bit… violent, shall we say.

"Quit your stuttering and go do something useful, you piece of trash!" she yelled. Sora straightened up, saluted, and let out a "Yes, ma'am!" before rushing off to do something that could be considered useful. While Sora was off looking for something to do, Kairi was approached by teenaged boy with shoulder-length, silver hair. This was their other friend, Riku. Riku let out a sigh of exasperation.

"You know, I came over here to see if Sora was alright, but given that he was just speaking to _you_ , I think we can all agree that he's definitely _not_." He commented, casually holding a huge log like it was nothing. Kairi let out a grunt of anger and suddenly turned towards Riku, giving him a look that could kill.

" _And what does_ _ **that**_ _mean…?_ " she demanded in a low, dangerous voice.

"Oh… crap." Riku said, realizing that he had just made a terrible mistake, one that he _really_ should have seen coming, given how long he had known Kairi. Kairi was just about to engage in mortal combat when Sora came running back, panting and holding up a rock.

"Hey, Kairi! I did something useful! See? I've found ourselves… a _rock!_ " he exclaimed happily. Only just now noticing the scene of violence that was about to break out before him, Sora added, "Oh. Um, maybe I'll just go over here…" Riku, meanwhile, was getting ready for the brawl, which involved getting rid of the log he was holding.

"Yeah, sure. Sora, take this." He said as he tossed the log at Sora. Sora let out a yelp right before he was crushed by the log, now struggling to get up. Riku and Kairi brought out their wooden swords, and with Kairi's battle cry sounding in the air, the two engaged in fierce combat. Something that Sora would have enjoyed watching if he wasn't currently being pinned to the ground by a small tree trunk.

Despite Sora's current situation, though, an epic battle was occurring between Riku and Kairi. There were quick strikes, parries, dodges, thrusts, dodge rolls, and the whole time, the two seemed evenly matched. There was, of course, the occasional banter between the two as well.

" _Stop dodging and let me hit you!_ " came Kairi's frustrated voice.

"No, because if you hit me, I'm most likely as good as dead." Riku replied.

"Someone get this thing off me!" Sora shouted, "I think I'm suffocating!"

"Shut up and let us do battle!" came the response from Riku and Kairi in unison. Grumbling under his breath, Sora continued to try to get the log off of him, but to no avail. Meanwhile, Kairi and Riku were just about done with their fight. Kairi managed to trip Riku while he was charging and pointed the sword at him. Victory was Kairi's.

"That'll teach you to say stuff like that!" she exclaimed, now feeling extremely triumphant.

"Okay, but can someone get this log off of me?!" Sora cried.

"Oh, right. Riku, get the log off of him." Kairi added. Riku gave Kairi a disapproving look.

"What? But why do _I_ have to?" Riku complained.

"Because _you're_ the one who threw it on him in the first place! And also because I said so." She added.

"You are so bossy!" Riku retorted.

"Yeah, well, we need that log to make the raft! Which _you're_ making, by the way!" Kairi explained.

"But why do we even _need_ a raft?! We can just use our boats!"

" _Because_ , Riku, the boats could get separated from each other! If we're on a raft, then we'll stay together!"

"We could get separated either way, you know…"

"Just do it!" Kairi yelled.

"You guys are always forcing me to do stuff…" Riku grumbled.

"Yeah, that's nice," Sora said, "but could ya HELP ME OUT, HERE?! I think I might have broken something! _Ow!_ …Wait, no, that was the rock." Then he started despairing about this rock very loudly. "Waaaagh, and after all that hard work I went through to get this rock! Now it broke!"

Promptly deciding to ignore Sora's despair over a rock of all things, Riku finally lifted the log off of Sora, who got up and continued to bemoan the loss of the rock. Until, of course, Kairi hit him on the head with one of the broken pieces of the rock and told him to get over it. "Hey, that hurt, Kairi! Why would you do something like that?!"

"Well, either way," Riku began, ignoring Sora's complaints about being hit on the head with a rock, "we need to gather supplies for the raft. I can't gather the logs _and_ the food by myself, you know!"

"'Course you can!" Sora replied enthusiastically, "You can do all kinds of stuff, Riku! You're a hard worker and all that!" Riku sighed at Sora's comment and replied,

"Yeah, sure, but you can't overwork me like this! I won't stand for it! Either you guys start helping out, or I'm not going to finish the raft!" At this, Kairi rolled her eyes.

"Oh, all right, fine. Sora here can help you out!" she added with a smile.

"… Wait, what?" came Sora's confused comment. Riku wasn't too pleased with this, either.

"Now you're just trying to find a way for the raft to be finished without doing any work!"

"No, Riku, you silly idiot, I'm organizing the tasks for Sora! After all, we all know how helpless Sora is without instructions." Kairi explained.

"Yeah, Riku, you know how helpless I am without… um… enstructures!" Sora agreed with some difficulty. "Wait, so, what are we talking about, again?" he added, confusing himself with his own mispronunciations.

"See what I mean?" she said, giving Sora an exasperated look.

"… You know what, you're right." Riku agreed, once again reminded of Sora's lack of competence.

"Right? Right about what? Who's right about something?" Sora asked, befuddled. "… How did this conversation even start?"

"You know what, Sora," Kairi said, reaching the end of her patience with Sora at this point, "how about you just go look for some food, okay? And make sure it's actually _edible_ this time!" she added harshly.

"Hey! Wood is perfectly edible! How else did our ancient sandsters survive?" he protested.

"I think you're thinking of wood _pulp_ , Sora. Hey, Kairi, that _is_ edible, right?" Riku questioned.

"Heck if I know. And anyways, our _ancestors_ survived by eating coconuts and seafood, same as we do! What are you, dense?!" she shouted. "As if that's something I need to ask." She added under her breath.

"Kairi, Kairi, Kairi. Don't you know that coconuts and seafood are _man-made?_ None of this stuff was here when our sandsters first arrived!" Sora explained like this was the most obvious thing in the world. "And also, yes, I am perfectly dense, thank you very much! My head can withstand _anything_ , because it's _that_ hardened!" he added with pride.

"Just get the food before I hit you again!" she demanded.

"Uh, right! On it!" Sora exclaimed before rushing off to find edible food. Meanwhile, Riku and Kairi decided to have a brief conversation. The topic? Sora.

"You know," Riku began, "it's times like this when I wonder how I managed to live with this guy for as long as I have without going insane."

"It's because I'm here. I mean, seriously. Without me, you'd be just as messed up as he is!" Kairi explained. Riku shuddered at the thought.

"I'm glad it hasn't come to that. Although, really. It's not as though you're any better; you're just less of an idiot." He commented. This let a spark of anger rise in Kairi.

" _What do you mean, 'I'm not any better'…?_ " she demanded.

"Um, forget what I said just now, okay…?"

" _You wish!_ I'm ten times better than that idiot Sora! I'm going to freaking kill you for that comparison!" she shouted.

"AAGH! DON'T HURT ME!" he cried, running away from Kairi as fast as he could. It was at that point when Sora came back, holding some food in his arms.

"Hey, guys, I'm back!" he announced. Then he saw Riku running away from Kairi like his life depended on it. Which it probably did. Sora, ignorantly unaware of the situation, took this differently than one would expect. "Oh, we're racing? Cool! First one to that tree over there gets to be captain!" he shouted, running after the tree he had pointed at as quickly as he could.

This got the attention of Riku and Kairi almost immediately. Both of them thought of the exact same thing at the same time, which was:

'Oh, crap! If that moron gets to the tree before us, he'll never stop acting like he's the captain of us! Think of the complete and utter _horrors!_ I have to get there before he does!'

And thus, the competition began.

Meanwhile, in a place far, far away, a huge, blue castle reigned supreme. This place was very different from the somewhat serene atmosphere of the islands; this place was known for its crazy antics caused by even crazier people that inhabited the place. Okay, so maybe the atmosphere wasn't very different from the islands at all.

However, it _was_ different in that it wasn't inhabited by humans, but by a large variety of anthropomorphic animals. There was the Mouse Royal Family, for instance, which was currently made up of none other than King Mickey Mouse and his wife, Minnie Mouse. When they got married or even how old they were was a complete mystery to everyone, as no one could tell how anyone from this dimension aged.

The other inhabitants of the large castle were small in both number and size, as most of the guards were none other than: broomsticks.

That's right. Broomsticks.

The castle was known for not having very good security, which was probably how the King had managed to disappear so suddenly without anyone noticing. Even the live guards, few as they were, were known for being extremely unreliable and not very bright.

Basically, if one were to compare, it was like the people of Destiny Islands had turned into animals, were running a kingdom, with Sora as the only living guard in the whole castle. As a result: the worst guarding system ever.

But thankfully, Sora was nowhere to be seen in this dimension, and instead, we have none other than: Donald Duck.

One could argue whether or not having Donald as a guard was any better than having Sora instead, but between these two, Donald had one very important attribute going for him: he had magic. How Donald learned to do magic was beyond anyone's understanding, as magic usually requires a great amount of focus and serenity. And Donald was probably the least focused and serene person in that entire dimension.

On the topic of Donald Duck, he was currently running through the INSANELY long hallways in the castle, which one would assume was called "Mouse Castle" or something of the sort. But no. The name of this castle was: Disney Castle. No one knew why, but nobody bothered to change it.

As Donald was running through the long, tedious hallways, he finally came into contact with the door. The really, REALLY big door. That door had to be at least twenty feet tall. Unfortunately for Donald, in his rush to get to the door, he ended up connecting his beak with the door. Really hard.

"WAAAK! That _hurt!_ " he exclaimed. In his annoyance, he kicked the door with a great deal of ferocity.

Bad move. He just ended up hurting his foot. Complaining about the door being against him, he proceeded to open the door. And thus, the true secret of the door was revealed: there was a much, much smaller door built into the huge one. A design flaw, perhaps?

Most definitely.

In any case, Donald continued to grumble in annoyance as he walked into the royal chambers of Mickey Mouse. Not really paying attention to what in front of him, he shouted, "Good morning, Micke-I mean, Your Majesty!" he had to shout because, like the previous hallway, this one stretched on almost endlessly.

After a great deal of walking and complaining, Donald finally reached the throne. Only then did he realize that King Mickey wasn't actually sitting in it like he was supposed to. "WHAT!" he exclaimed, "You mean I had to run ALL THE WAY through the fifteen flights of stairs, across ten corridors and an _extremely_ misplaced LAKE, _just_ to find out that Mickey isn't even _here?!_ WHAT IS LIFE!?"

Seething at the fact that he had traveled through the castle with the worst possible design ever for nothing, he noticed none other than Pluto, the royal dog, poke his head out from behind the throne. And in Pluto's mouth was an envelope. Curious to see what Pluto was doing with an envelope in his mouth, Donald approached him and took the envelope from his mouth.

*_Oh, THANK GOD. That tasted _horrible!_ I had to hold that thing in my mouth for _three hours_ waiting for you to get here! What's wrong with this castle design, anyway?! I mean, putting a GIANT FREAKIN' LAKE in the middle of the _dining room_ is just ridiculous! And another thing-!_* Pluto ranted, but unfortunately, all Donald heard was barking, as Pluto was a non-anthropomorphic dog and therefor couldn't speak proper English. Donald interrupted him, though, with his screech of shock after reading the letter inside the envelope.

"WAAAAAAK! WHAT DO I DO?! I AM _NOT_ GOING BACK DOWN THERE!" he screamed, worried that he might have to traverse through the lake along with over a dozen flights of stairs yet again.

Then, an idea struck him. It probably wasn't a very good idea, but it would definitely save another three hours' worth of traveling through the worst designed castle in the universe. And so, Donald began searching for a rope and a really long pole. Meanwhile, Pluto decided to read the letter that Donald had left on the ground in his rush to find rope. It read:

' _HIYA, PALS!_

 _Guess what? I had the most AMAZING experience last night! I was watching the stars, right? And then- POOF! A few of the stars went out! They must have gone_ _ **supernova**_ _or something! It was SO FREAKING AWESOME!_

 _Unfortunately, stars are supposed to represent other dimensions for some reason, so I think entire DIMENSIONS are going "poof!" It's incredible! But I have to do something about it. Otherwise, the darkness will engulf the entire universe, and everything will be sent to the Shadow Realm! So I have to go. And seeing as you and Goofy are the most reliable, sensible, and competent out of all my guards, I've decided not to take you two, my personal bodyguards, with me on this extremely dangerous mission._

 _I'm writing this instead of saying it to you directly because if I did, you would try to go with me, and I can't have that. Also, you two sleep at the bottom of the castle, while I'm at the top. That's 20 flights of stairs, at least 15 corridors, a misplaced lake, a misplaced pinecone field, and the Ocean Chamber to deal with. No way am I going through all that just to tell you about an incredibly important mission that could affect the entire universe!_

 _So, instead of bringing you two with me, I'm going to have to ask you to complete a long and tedious task for me. Find someone with a Keyblade that isn't me and stick with him or her. I_ _ **would**_ _tell you what the point of this task is, but making it mysterious is more fun._

 _I've left Pluto to give you this message, since no one else has the patience to stand around and wait for you to get to the royal chamber doing nothing but sitting. Also, I've left Toodles with you, as well. So whenever you're stuck, just yell, "Oh, Toodles!" And he'll be right there to help you with some Mouseketools!_

 _And with that, I'm off!_

 _From,_

 _Mickey.'_

There was a long pause. Pluto couldn't think of anything to say, but he was once again wondering how Mickey became a king with the kind of skewed logic that kept him doing things like this. Meanwhile, Donald was experiencing a bout of frustration. Why? Because he couldn't find anything to help him down the side of the castle. Little did Donald know that the previously mentioned Toodles currently had an item that would help him with this goal. However, everyone except Mickey had tried constantly to forget about that shtick they had going years ago.

Donald was about to give up when Pluto approached him and made circle shapes with his ears, mimicking Toodles's ears. Still not taking the hint, Donald ignored him and started bemoaning his current situation. "Oh, it's hopeless! The stars are going out, Mickey's out there alone, and I'm stuck in this castle with a dog just because this castle has the worst design ever! At this rate, I'll never get to tell Goofy!"

Pluto sighed. Convincing Donald to call for Toodles was more trouble than it was worth.

Meanwhile, back on the islands, Riku had managed to win the race to the tree, which annoyed Kairi but barely fazed Sora at all.

"Alright, Riku!" Sora shouted, "You get to be the captain!" Riku raised an eyebrow.

"Um, right. Okay, so um, my first Captainly duty will be to... um... name the ship!" he declared, albeit with some difficulty. And thus, he started to think of what to name the ship. Something that soon proved difficult because Kairi and Sora were both watching him. Unable to come up with anything, he decided to ask Kairi for advice. "Uh, do you have any ideas, Kairi?" he asked. Kairi shrugged.

"Meh. Names never have been my specialty." she replied.

"Let's call it 'Vennie the Wind Rider'!" Sora exclaimed. Both Riku and Kairi gave him a disapproving look.

"Nobody asked for your opinion, Sora." Kairi retorted.

"Seriously, Sora, haven't you just about had it with all this talk about your imaginary boyfriend?" Riku asked, annoyed by Sora's constant ramblings. Sora got a defiant look on his face.

"He's _not_ imaginary, and he's not my boyfriend, either! We're just-"

"-Very close, we know, already!" Kairi and Riku interrupted in unison.

"Exactly!" he agreed, oblivious to the fact that his friends were getting fed up with him once again. Kairi let out an irritated sigh and whipped out a sudden, inexplicable clipboard out of nowhere.

"Uh, where did you get that…?" Riku asked, staring at the clipboard with an expression of shock. Kairi ignored him and faced Sora with a look of determination.

"Alright, Sora. I have a long, complicated list of things I need you to get for the trip. Can you do that?" she asked, knowing that Sora could only follow extremely simple instructions. Sora smiled a bit shyly and blushed a little.

"Well, of course, Kairi! It's you who's asking, after all…" he said, looking down at the ground to avoid eye contact. Suddenly feeling like he had just said something strange, Sora quickly became flustered and began stuttering. "Uh, th-that's not to say I wouldn't do it for anyone else, but, uh, I-I mean…"

"Shut up and start listening to the instructions!" Kairi shouted, getting annoyed at Sora's behavior.

"YES, SIR!" he replied, barely noticing the fact that he had just referred to Kairi as "sir."

"Okay, so I need you to get some fish, coconuts, mushrooms, and a seagull egg." She listed off the clipboard she was holding. Riku gave her an incredulous look.

"Just that? Shouldn't we get a lot more different kinds of food than that?" pausing, he added, "And why the heck do we need a seagull egg?" Kairi rolled her eyes as if Riku was some kind of idiot.

"Obviously because I want a pet seagull. _Duh._ " She replied. "Who knows how long we'll be out there? I won't be able to tolerate you two unless I have an escape route. But since we'll be in the ocean, I won't have any! So obviously, I'll need to have someone else to talk to on the way. And that is going to be the seagull." Riku gave her a dumbstruck look but said nothing.

Meanwhile, Sora was trying to remember exactly how this conversation came into being. Yep, he had already completely forgotten the directions Kairi had just given him. He had always had a problem with short-term memory loss, especially when a conversation went off-topic even for the slightest moment.

"So, um, what am I supposed to be doing, again…?" he asked, causing his two best friends around him to facepalm in irritation. Sora laughed a little, thinking once again about how wonderful his friends were.

Little did he know that a mysteriously robed figure had entered the island, or that a stubborn duck was considering jumping out a window from one of the highest floors in a giant, horribly designed castle several dimensions away.

* * *

Author's Notes: And so, we are introduced to Kairi and Riku, who are both questionable friends to have. Let it be known that, just like everything else in this series, the SoKai pairing is not to be taken too seriously.

We also get to see more of Sora's lack of ability to comprehend things like words. There's a reason he wasn't chosen by the Keyblade at first.


	3. Things are a-Happening

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, it belongs to Square Enix and Disney.**

 **Author's Notes: OH DEAR, SWEET LORD, IT'S FINALLY DONE. I NEVER THOUGHT THE DAY WOULD COME. Ajlfjh;dfkjghdkhsdg... please enjoy.**

* * *

It was at precisely 2:00 P.M when many people looked up at the sky and thought, "Wow, I sure am glad there aren't any ducks flying out of twentieth-story windows right now." Why they thought this was unclear, but some assumed that it was for irony's sake. And those people were proven correct when, just as they finished thinking that sentence, a duck was seen flying out of the most important twenty-story window in the county: the window in Castle Disney.

Those people would never understand the importance of this falling duck, nor would they ever think of it again, as these happenings were fairly normal at the Disney Kingdom.

But this falling duck had a mission: warn his incredibly incompetent friend about an emergency that, if left unattended, would spell the end of the universe as we know it… but it would also just destroy the universe, period.

And as such, the duck ran with as much vigor as he could muster after having traveled through the most unbearable castle in the multiverse, which was a surprisingly large amount. All while shrieking at the top of his ear-shattering vocal cords, "I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT CARTOON PHYSICS WOULD HAVE MADE THIS POSSIBLE! HOW DID I NOT THINK OF THIS SOLUTION THREE HOURS AGO!?"

No one knew what he was talking about, mostly because no one else was within hearing range.

As the duck's squat, feathery form waddled around at the speed of sound towards his destination, he clutched a letter tightly in his hand before proceeding to stick it in his mouth. Boy, did that paper taste amazing.

Upon finally reaching his friend, a lanky dog known as "Goofy", he started yelling many a warning at him, which were all mostly incoherent because the letter, now scrunched into a rough circle, was still jammed in the duck's mouth. To anyone listening, they would have thought that he was choking on something while strangling himself in an attempt to get it out.

The duck hastily pulled the letter out of his mouth and began shouting actual words instead.

"GOOFY! WAKE UP, YOU MORONIC PINCOUSHIN!" he yelled, banging Goofy over the head with a staff he got from nowhere. "I HAVE A SUPER-SECRET-AWESOME THING TO WARN YOU ABOUT!"

The physical abuse he was applying to Goofy's head proved to be insufficient, however, and in his magical rage, he whipped up a basketful of lightning bolts and proceeded to throw each and every one of them at the sleeping Goofy. "WAKE UP, FOR I AM THOR INCARNATE!" the duck screamed.

Thankfully, Goofy finally managed to wake up, in a slight panic, yes, but he was now awake, and that was the only thing that mattered to the duck.

"Wha—huh—what?" Goofy stuttered, looking around and finally setting his eyes on the short, little duck in front of him. He smiled. "Well, hey-a there, Donald! How're things?" he asked, acting unusually civil for one who just received twenty blows to the head and twice that amount in lightning bolts.

"How are things?! _Things?!_ I just climbed through the entire Disney Castle, discovered a horrible message that should probably be kept a secret from everybody, leapt through a window on the twentieth story of said castle, nearly choked on said message, and used up ALL of my MP in an attempt to wake you up… AND YOU'RE ASKING ME HOW _THINGS ARE?!_ " Donald shrieked, feeling so phenomenally done with the universe he wondered how he was even still breathing.

Goofy blinked a few times.

"…A message that should be kept a secret? Even from… Minnie?" Goofy wondered aloud, although his eyes darted away from Donald when he said "Minnie."

Donald couldn't care less about that, though, because he was too busy wanting to scream. Which he did just a few moments later.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH—!"

"And Daisy?" Goofy continued, ignoring Donald's outburst with the amount of skill that one can only obtained by being around Donald for twenty-four hours a day.

Donald promptly stopped screaming, finally taking note of the fact that Goofy wasn't talking to him.

"…Wait a second…" he realized slowly before turning around. Behind him, the Queen of Disney, Minnie Mouse, and her advisor (as well as Donald's girlfriend), Daisy. Minnie was chuckling quietly to herself, while Daisy just looked incredibly angered. Donald smiled awkwardly. "Uh… hi, Your Highness. Daisy. Ah… how are you two kind ladies doing?" he asked politely in an attempt to keep Daisy from murdering him on the spot.

"Drop it, Donald," came Daisy's response, "What's the big secret that should be kept from us? TELL ME BEFORE I HURT YOU!" her voice suddenly raised in volume, prompting a scared "meep" from Donald and a laugh from Minnie.

"You better tell her, Donald. You wouldn't want those feathers of yours to be cooked in an oven, now, would you?" Minnie asked in a voice that would have sounded completely innocent if not for the threat. Donald gulped.

"Um… right. Well, uh, it's very important and crucial, and… well…" he said awkwardly before shouting, "THE KING'S GONE MISSING!"

The reaction was instantaneous. Minnie let out an over-dramatic gasp while Daisy suddenly started screaming and spewing fire out of her mouth, whether from anger or shock, no one knew. Goofy stood up, adjusting his hat, and Donald spontaneously burst into tears at the very thought of his beloved Mickey was missing. In fact, he was so engulfed in his grief that he _almost_ didn't notice that Daisy had begun slapping him.

Only almost, though.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT ALREADY?!" Daisy shrieked, and Goofy wondered why all ducks seemed to have an obsession with screaming. And rather than giving an answer to that question, Donald replied,

"B-but he left a letter!" he stuttered, and Daisy stopped smacking him around for the moment. "He said that entire dimensions are going 'poof' and told us to go to hunt down someone with a Keyblade that isn't him and stick with them for an unspecified reason!"

There was a moment of silence following that. And that silence would have gone on for much longer had Minnie not broken it first with a longing sigh.

"Oh, that's just like my Mickey. He never knows what's going on in his own noggin. Well, since I suspected something like this would happen—"

"You can predict what the King is going to do?" Goofy interrupted. "I didn't even know that was possible."

"It comes from being his wife. Now anyways, I've prepared a cricket to help you on your journey!" Minnie exclaimed happily. Donald and Goofy stared, while Daisy just sighed.

"…A cricket?" Donald and Goofy both wondered at once. Suddenly, a new, smaller voice made itself present in the conversation.

"Excuse me, I am not just a cricket!" the voice exclaimed; Donald and Goofy both looked down to see a small cricket wearing a top hat and a bowtie giving them a look of displeasure, which was by far the weirdest thing that had happened to them that day. "I am Jiminy Cricket, and might I point out that I was not 'prepared', as Your Highness so graciously described, I was brought here because of inexplicable reasons and also because my world was destroyed!"

After a few moments of blinking on Goofy and Donald's part, Donald suddenly began snickering.

"Hey, Goofy. It's a cricket." He said. This was apparently of great amusement, as the two of them began laughing hysterically.

"Why did I accept this job…" Jiminy wondered to himself.

* * *

Back on Destiny Islands, the sunset was shimmering on the ocean like a field of fireflies. Except, you know, it was water instead of bugs. It was truly a beautiful sight, one which Sora and his friends had become accustomed to seeing. After all, they came to this exact same slanted tree overlooking the ocean almost every day.

The tree was in fact so slanted that it worked as a great chair for Sora and Kairi. Of course, Riku was convinced he was too cool for sitting and instead stuck to leaning on the tree like a boss.

"So…" Sora began, breaking the now ten-minute long silence. "…Kairi's original home is somewhere out there, right?"

Kairi, unlike everyone else, wasn't born on Destiny Islands. In fact, she first arrived on the island by falling from the sky like a shooting star. It was quite alarming to say the least, but it drove Riku (and to a certain degree, Sora) to wonder if there were other worlds beyond the horizon that Kairi could have come from. Kairi couldn't say, of course, because she couldn't remember anything prior to waking up on the islands and meeting Sora.

Sora wasn't the best thing to suddenly wake up to, but things don't always happen the way we think they should.

"Most likely, yeah," Riku responded, "But it's not like we can know for sure just sitting around here, right?"

"Technically, you're standing." Sora felt the need to point out. Riku gave him an annoyed look before looking back at the sunset before them. Kairi, on the other hand, was suddenly struck by an extremely important question.

"Wait, so, assume we _do_ get to another world…" she suddenly broke out into a giggling fit, earning her alarmed looks from her two friends. Finally calming down enough to breathe properly, she continued, "…What are we supposed to do there?"

Riku blinked.

Sora stuck a lollipop in his mouth.

Kairi waited impatiently for an answer.

"Well…" Riku said awkwardly. "Umm… well, I kinda… uh… never really thought about that part." Before Kairi or Sora could say anything else about that, Riku attempted to regain his dignity immediately by quickly adding, "But, you know, I just always wondered why we ended up on this island."

"Obviously because you were born here." Kairi interjected with a flat expression. Riku pouted in response.

"Okay, but couldn't we have just as easily been born somewhere _else?_ " he insisted. Sora, whose brain felt like it was about to be fried from all the philosophical mumbo-jumbo flying around in the air, promptly adjusted his position on the tree so that he was laying on his back.

"I dunno." Sora replied intelligently.

"Exactly," Riku emphasized, "You don't know anything."

Kairi laughed at that, and Sora probably would have taken offense to that had he cared at all about what Riku was saying. However, Kairi, being Kairi, decided to mock Riku's point like there was no tomorrow.

"You say that, and you've been thinking _so much_ lately, haven't you?" she said sarcastically. Riku, for once in his life, decided _not_ to pick up on the sarcastic bit. Instead, he smiled brightly and said,

"Well, all that thinking's thanks to you, Kairi."

It was at this moment that Sora finally took notice of the conversation. Something in Riku's voice bothered him, whether the fact that he was being happy for once or that he was being so sincere with Kairi, he wasn't sure.

Riku then continued, "After all, if you hadn't come crashing down onto the island out of nowhere, I… probably wouldn't have thought of any of this." He gave Kairi a thumbs-up. "Kairi, thanks." And Kairi wasn't sure what to say to that.

Sora shifted a bit uncomfortably. He wasn't usually the type to get jealous, but the fact that Riku was being so… weirdly nice to Kairi made him uncomfortable. What was he supposed to do if this turned into some weird competition? He wasn't sure he could handle competing with Riku over anything but painfully mundane things. And according to Sora, Kairi most certainly was not a mundane thing.

When the time came for them to head back to their respective houses, Kairi was the first to leave. Sora and Riku followed soon after, but their trek home was interrupted when Riku suddenly decided to throw a fruit at him.

"Hey, Sora! Catch!" he had exclaimed, and Sora, not expecting the sudden action, turned around to have a fruit hit him squarely in the face.

" _Aack!_ " he cried out, as the force of the fruit had knocked him into the ground. He pulled the fruit off of his face, revealing that a red star-shaped mark had been left there. For the first time that day, he felt genuinely annoyed. "What the heck was that for?!" he demanded, pulling himself off the ground. Riku snickered.

"Well, you wanted one, right?" he laughed.

"Wanted _what?!_ A fruit to be thrown in my face?! What would you have done if I still had that lollipop in my mouth, huh?!" Sora yelled. He had finished the lollipop a few minutes earlier, throwing the stick to the winds.

"Look at what fruit it is, doofus." Riku said. Sora blinked a few times before looking at the fruit. It was yellow, star-shaped, and generally looked delicious.

"A paopu fruit?" Sora guessed. Riku smiled, an amused expression on his face.

"Yep. You know, they say that if two people share the fruit, their destinies become intertwined. No matter what happens to them, they'll always be a part of each other's hearts," Riku explained. Sora blinked.

"Sounds… mushy," he commented. "Why would I want one of these…?" Riku rolled his eyes.

"Really, Sora? You can't think of anyone you'd want to be connected to forever? A… love interest, perhaps?" he hinted. Suddenly, the meaning of Riku's words hit Sora like a wave of cold water, and he suddenly began blushing furiously.

"U-um, well, I guess there's always Kairi… but there's no way that would work, she never shares anything with me!" he protested. "I mean, you have a good point, and now suddenly, yes, I do want one of these. Thank you _so much_ , Riku!" he exclaimed suddenly, bringing Riku into an embrace. " _You're such a good friend!_ "

And with that, Sora rushed off, eager to find Kairi and hope that this would somehow work the way he was fantasizing it would.

Meanwhile, Riku was still rooted to the spot, an eyebrow twitching in a mixture of shock, annoyance, and disappointment.

 _I wanted him to share it with me…_ he thought miserably.

Sora, having forgot where Kairi's house was in his blaze of excitement, suddenly found himself in a familiar cave. It was the cave where he and Kairi had scribbled on the walls, labeled The Secret Place, because only they knew about it. Well, technically, Riku knew about it, too, but he had stopped coming there ever since he and Kairi had begun hogging the place.

His instincts had told him that, if he couldn't find Kairi's house, then he might as well go to the only other place that she could have gone to, which just so happened to be this cave. One of the pictures on the wall caught his attention; a scribble they had done together when they were six. Kairi had drawn Sora, whereas Sora had drawn Kairi right next to it. Suddenly feeling sentimental, and disappointed that he couldn't bring the fruit to her personally, he sat down and began to draw some more.

Once he was finished, he stood proudly before his creation. He had added a misshapen arm holding a paopu fruit, making it look like his portrait was offering Kairi's portrait the destiny-binding fruit.

He sighed happily, the way he always did when he thought about Kairi. That fruit wasn't going anywhere, but this doodle was good enough for now. He couldn't help but think of how awesome Riku was to give it to him, and how his love for Kairi was most likely not going to go anywhere.

But then, as if the universe itself had decided that the scene was far too heartwarming for its own good, a rustling in the cave bushes was heard, startling Sora out of his daydream with a terrified scream.

"AAAAHHHGGGGG!" he yelled, brandishing a rock in one hand like his life depended on it. "Who are you?! What are you doing here?! STOP LOOKING AT ME WITH YOUR NONEXISTENT EYES!"

"Calm down, kid, I'm just here to check out this amazing door." Came the response.

The figure—as it was, indeed, a figure—wore a brown robe that covered his entire face in shadows, as well as hiding his hands and the robe reached all the way down to the floor. If Sora knew better, he would have assumed that this was a person wearing a cloak, but since this was Sora we're talking about, he immediately thought it was a Ring-Wraith. Or a Dementor. Either one worked.

Sora screamed yet again and threw the rock in the Ring-Wraith's direction, to which it missed miserably and Sora was left cowering behind nothing.

"Don't kill me, don't kill me, don't kill me!" he wailed. The Ring-Wraith sighed in response.

"This world has been connected…" the figure stated.

"I don't know or care about what that means, just don't murder me! I'm too adorable to die!" Sora cried in response.

"…Tied to the darkness…" the figure continued.

"Mm-hmm…" Sora acknowledged, on the verge of crying in an extremely pathetic manner.

"…Soon to be completely eclipsed…" the figure continued once again. Sora vaguely noted how deep the dude's voice was, and how it most definitely _wasn't_ Riku or Kairi.

"Look, I don't know who you are, but stop freaking me out like this!" he yelled before suddenly feeling confused. "…Actually, where _did_ you come from?" he wondered, most signs of distress gone.

"Oh, nowhere, just making sure that past events are going to be set in motion in the somewhat distant future," the Dementor commented casually. "And you still don't know what lies beyond the door, by the way."

"Wait… so… let me get this straight." Sora said, putting all of his brain power into figuring this one out. "You're… not saying anything that makes sense… but you mentioned a door, which is like an entrance to things… and, since I know what lies beyond every door in this island… then that means…" he gasped dramatically. "THAT MEANS YOU'RE FROM ANOTHER WORLD! _I WIN!_ " Sora exclaimed proudly.

"Wow… you know, there's so much to learn, and yet… you understand _so little_ …" the figure responded. Sora put on a defiant face, all signs of the cowering mess he was from a few minutes ago completely lost.

"Yeah, well, I'll show you! I'm gonna go out there, find Kairi's homeland, meet new ice creams, learn how to pronounce words and then I'll understand! I'll understand it _all!_ YOU CAN'T STOP ME—"

"A meaningless effort."

"Wow, what a killjoy." Sora commented.

"One who knows nothing can understand nothing…"

Sora was about to protest when the figure suddenly disappeared, leaving him wondering what the heck just happened and if it was a result of his own weird imagination. He still couldn't help wonder how the Ring-Wraith/Dementor dude got there in the first place, but hey, he had dinner to eat. Why worry about the creepy stalker dude when he could just as easily be enjoying food?

* * *

It was the next day, at sunset once again. Riku had gone off to who-knows-where—supposedly to do "homework" or some crap like that—which left Sora and Kairi by themselves, watching the sunset on a wooden platform. This, of course, made Sora feel extremely anxious. What the heck was he supposed to say to her? Here they were, at an almost stereotypically romantic scene, and he had absolutely nothing to say. Sure, he _could_ talk about how he was being stalked by a mysterious person in a brown cloak, and how they had insulted his intelligence, and how they had the power to warp in and out of existence, but more likely than not, no one would believe him. Besides, that would be a _boring_ thing to talk about.

"So, um—" Sora began, only to be quickly interrupted.

"You know, Riku has changed." She said.

"Oh. Um. How, exactly?" he asked, confused by the sudden comment. Kairi seemed to be thinking this over.

"I dunno, but he's _definitely_ changed," she replied helpfully. Sora just decided to let the matter drop for now, since they clearly weren't getting anywhere with this. And it was then that Kairi did the exact same thing, and said something completely random and off-topic: "Hey, Sora! You know what we should do? We should just take the raft and go, just you and me! Ditch Riku and set sailing for ourselves, am I right?"

Sora wasn't sure how to respond to that. But he was pretty sure he was giving Kairi a look that clearly said, "What in The Universe is wrong with your brain?"

Kairi laughed. "I'm only kidding, moron!" she added playfully. At this, Sora let out a huge sigh of relief.

"Oh, good! I thought you had gone crazy or something!" he replied, relieved. If only what Kairi had said just then was true, and she _was_ only kidding. But she wasn't about to say that to Sora, now, was she?

"You know what, Sora? Even though you're hopelessly idiotic, optimistic, and panic over every little thing you could possibly panic over…" Kairi began. Sora could feel his flustered being rise into existence. Was this the love confession he had been hoping for since he was but a tiny child?

Could it be that Kairi actually… _liked_ him?

It sounded too good to be true…

"…Don't ever change, Sora."

…And of course it was. Sora smiled as sweetly as he could when his hopes and dreams were momentarily crushed.

"Oh, uh… okay," he replied.

* * *

"…and then the creatures started having a rave party, and it was terrifying, I tell you, terrifying! I have never seen such a horror in my life—the very embodiment of darkness, the Heartless themselves, dancing to disco music! How could they do something so _evil?!_ And might I add—!"

"Goofy, do you hear something?" Donald interrupted.

"You mean the tiny voice on top of my head? Hmmm… gawrsh, I don't think so," he replied.

"Must be the wind, huh…"

" _Excuse me!_ " Jiminy Cricket piped up once more, "I'm _trying_ to give you important exposition over here!" Donald huffed.

"Ah, screw the exposition, we have a job to do!" he yelled. "Right, Goofy?!"

"Does that job include walking down this misplaced, endless staircase leading to nowhere?" he asked. "Because I still haven't figured that part out."

"Don't ask questions, Goofy. They'll never be answered." Donald answered.

* * *

It was night. And as Sora usually did when it was night, he was laying on his bed. Unlike other nights, however, he wasn't sleeping. Why? Well, the fact that he had come so close to hearing a love confession from his childhood love interest might have had something to do with it, but hey, what do we know?

Sora, taking a rare moment in his life to think, was wondering what he could have done better in that situation like the angsty teenager he presumably was. Of course, since such thoughts were completely meaningless to the happenings outside, said happenings decided to snap him out of them. After all, the universe couldn't allow such sentimentalities in our main character, now, could they?

With a loud crackle of thunder, Sora screamed and jerked up in his bed, hastily looking out the window, only just noticing the huge, dark storm. It was on the island that he, Riku, and Kairi had been on earlier! A realization hit him like the whirlwind blasting through his window.

"Oh, snap! Our raft! IT'S GONNA DIE! I'M COMIN' FOR YA, RAFT!"

And thus, he jumped out the window, faintly hearing a woman's voice say something about dinner—maybe she was his mom, he wasn't sure—rowed his flimsy boat to the island, and landed on the shore.

"Wow, that happened really quickly. It was only described in one sentence!" he remarked. His humor was cut short when he saw the black and purple swirling ball of mass in the sky. He took a deep breath, then released it all in a single, petrified scream before taking another deep breath to shout, "OH MY GOD, WHAT IS THAT THING!?"

Of course, he didn't have much time to focus on that, because suddenly, from the ground rose the black, golden-eyed creatures from his dream! He would have screamed again if he hadn't used up all his breath from before. Instead, he thought to himself, _'Oh, crap… at least I brought my wooden sword.'_

What a wooden sword could do against physical shadows, no one knew. Except Sora, of course, after he struck at one of them with said sword. And the answer he received was: it does absolutely nothing!

Panicking now that his only weapon was useless, he ran. How far, he wasn't sure, he was too busy panicking to pay attention.

What he _was_ sure of, however, was that he came across Riku standing in the heat of the storm with his back turned to him.

"RIKU?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! AND WHERE'S KAIRI, I THOUGHT SHE WAS WITH YOU?! I MEAN, THERE WERE THE BOATS AND EVERYTHING!" Sora yelled, barely able to hear himself over the cacophony that was the storm.

"The door has opened…" Riku replied ominously.

"WHAT?! SPEAK UP, I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"

"I SAID," Riku yelled in return, "THE DOOR HAS OPENED, OKAY, SORA?! NOW WE CAN GO TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD AND ALL THAT JAZZ! WE CAN EAT CREAM PUFFS AND STUFF, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!" Sora blinked a few times, which was albeit hard to do with the wind blowing in his eyeballs.

"BUT… BUT KAIRI." Came his intelligent response.

"SHE'S COMING, TOO."

"I'M FEELING UNREASONABLY UPSET ABOUT THIS." Sora replied, his face contorted into one that looked both angry and confused—most likely at his own emotions. Riku took a deep breath.

"WE'RE GONNA GO THROUGH THE THING, MOST LIKELY NEVER COME BACK, AND NEVER SEE OUR PARENTS AGAIN!" he shouted.

"WE HAVE _PARENTS?!_ " Sora screamed in response.

" _I'M NOT AFRAID OF THE DARKNESS!_ " Riku shrieked at the top of his lungs, completely ignoring Sora's bout of confusion. And then, without any further explanation, he reached out his hand in beckoning towards Sora.

Sora, naturally, rushed towards Riku without any hesitation, only to be suddenly stopped in mid-position by… what?

Was that the… _superglue whirlpool?!_

And as he looked closer, he saw that Riku had been caught in it, too! In fact, swirly wisps of darkness were swirling all around him and his friend!

Sora yelled something incoherent in fear and panic, reaching out to Riku's hand like his life depended on it. As he did so, he couldn't help but think to himself:

' _Must… reach… best friend…!'_

Oddly enough, Riku, who was still holding his hand out, was thinking at the exact same time:

' _Must… beckon… potential love interest!'_

And then the whirlpool of dark, magical superglue engulfed the two of them, and for a few moments, all they could see was the blackness.

Until, you know, a bright light shone through said darkness, and something spawned in Sora's hand. He gasped, and looked at the object with great fascination. It looked… well, it looked like a giant key, really. And Sora wasn't sure what to make out of that. He soon became more concerned with the fact that Riku had disappeared.

"WAAAAHHHhhhh… what do I do?!" he cried out, before smacking himself several times afterwards to regain a grip on himself. "Okay, Sora. Focus. So, Riku left. All that leaves is…" he gasped. "Kairi!"

Keyblade… a voice suddenly sounded in his head. A familiar voice. Sora let out a yelp of surprise.

"Wagh! Is that… is that _you_ , Texter?!" he demanded.

Shut up before I Mind-Crush you. he replied calmly. Now, ahem. Keyblade… he said again. Sora blinked.

"You already said that, and what are you talking about? What's a Keyblade?" he asked.

See, and here I was, trying to help you figure out the obvious. And yet you can't even seem to do that. Wonderful. he complained, and with that, he was gone. Sora wasn't sure _how_ he knew he was gone, but he was certain of it. He grumbled under his breath before setting his sights on the newly-spawned shadow creatures.

Hey, if a random item was going to spawn in his hand out of nowhere, he might as well use it.

To his surprise, the giant key actually _worked_ against the thingies! Letting out a cry of triumph, he continued to mercilessly slash the creatures to bits until he made his way to where Kairi apparently was—the Secret Place.

He let out a gasp of surprise and happiness upon finding her. "KAIRI! THERE YOU ARE, I WAS SO WORRIED!" he shouted. However, something was clearly off. Instead of berating him or anything of the sort, she slowly turned to look at him, a clouded look in her eyes. "Uh… Kairi?" he said.

"Sora…" she replied, in a creepy monotone voice that made Sora want to run for the hills. "They took… the nachos…" Sora let out a horrified gasp.

"THOSE FIENDS!" he yelled.

Then, the door Kairi was standing in front of burst open, letting in an unreasonable amount of wind and dark swirlies. Kairi was flung towards Sora by the wind pressure, and Sora, in response, spread his arms out to catch her.

 _Oh, crap, I hope I don't kiss her by accident…_ Sora thought to himself in the split second he had before he caught Kairi.

Except… he _didn't_ catch Kairi. She just phased through him like… something he couldn't think of a good simile for. He let out a wail in response.

"Oh, _NO_ , I _DID_ KISS HER BY ACCIDENT! MY SOUL IS SO IMPURE, IT HURTS ME!" as he himself went flying with the wind, he found himself yelling, "FORGIVE ME, KAIRI!"

Then he landed on the sand, sputtering nonsense words and wondering why sand tasted so much like burnt toast. When he looked up, however, he was greeted with the most terrible of sights: the giant, menacing creature who despised Sora's dancing skills from his dream was standing right in front of him!

"Don't… don't tell me I have to fight you… again…" Sora said hopelessly to himself.

Oh, dear. It was going to be a _long_ night for poor Sora.

* * *

 **Author's Notes: Yes, I teased SoRiku. Deal with it.**

 **So, anyhow, hopefully this chapter isn't a complete mess. I was working on it over random periods of time, so... yeah. Read & Review? Thanks.**


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